The 15th Parallel (T15P) was on-site yesterday at the Ynares Center to cover the Wild-card phase of the PBA. For those who have deserted watching the PBA, the wild-card phase of the elimination round is the phase where the teams unlucky or stupid enough not to reach the outright semifinals and quarterfinals slots fight for their lives a-la Battle Royale style. The format is a bracket format, with each game being a 1-game knockout with the lone survivor facing the #3 team in the quarterfinals.

The first game between the Realtors and the Aces was a very boring one; the T15P correspondents were all eager to forget and leave the game one and for all. Pandaemonaeon at my left was fast asleep, Nash Castro was nowhere to be found, just like his idol when put in clutch situations. Yours truly just watched the game in defense that, hey, I’m a basketball fan! So let me watch these games, even if they are as boring as the Spurs.

In short, the correspondents endured watching 2 and half hours of Spurs-type basketball from Sta. Lucia and the poor man’s version of the Triangle from Tim Cone and Alaska. I must admit though that something good came out of the 2 hours of endurance; former La Salle hotshot Joseph Yeo starred for the Realtors by scoring 27 points on an efficient 8-12 from the field. Kelly Williams added 23 and 13 and the Realtors are off to the next stage as they sent the Aces packing with a 99-86 win. Good for Yeo. It’s damn time that he set a pretty good career-high now that he has one title in his bag.

Aside from that, the PBA has lost its drama. Well, aside from James Yap crying in Game 6 of the All Filipino Cup finals a couple of months ago that caused multiple orgasms among his fangirls, and the tussle of Yeo and Yap in also last conference’s finals, nothing dramatic much has happened to the PBA. The action is there but the drama in sports just makes it doubly interesting — also which makes the UAAP triply interesting than the PBA.

Going back on course, we really thought that we were going to end the day on a boring PBA snorefest; but as the cliche goes, it ain’t over till the fat lady sings. Simply bridging the ideas, we got the drama that we wanted. A lot of it, with bonuses.

Before that, a little seasoning. The game was Purefoods vs Talk and Text. The Giants raced to an early 12-2 lead, but then they have this uncanny talent to give up leads, and they’re as good as the Lakers in giving up huge leads. Talk and Text got back. Yours truly went out of the arena to get some fresh air and some hotdogs — so I did not see how TnT got back the lead. When I got back, it was them leading by 21 and it was already the start of the fourth quarter.

Okay, enough with the off-topic shit. Here comes the meat of my field report.

[youtube:http://youtube.com/watch?v=n1CdiJbhbLY]

There was 9:45 left in the final quarter, PJ Simon gives the ball to Jondan Salvador in the post. His defender was Terence Leather. Salvador sizes Leather and then bodies him up, then gives him a strong bump. The crowd and the Purefoods team is aroused by the bump and they cheer on Salvador. I woke Panda from his sleep and shouted “Tsong, may dramang magaganap dito. Gising! Puta tulog ka ng tulog!” Jondan, with his false sense of security, bumps Leather hard for another time.

And another time. And then both the players get entangled, prompting the referee to blow his whistle.

Leather looks at Salvador using the eyes and the fire of the devil. Salvador, fearing for his life, gives the ball as a peace offering to Leather with two hands. However, the Talk and Text import would not accept Salvador’s peace offering. Instead, he throws it back at poor Salvador’s face which prompts a bench-clearing incident, and then James fucking Yap comes up from behind and gives Leather a kick somewhere in his back. Leather turned his back, looked at Yap with anger plus hatred equivalent to a thousand burning suns and chased him. Several more TNT and PF players already went into the court to stop the inevitable from happening. Luckily they did stop. If they didn’t, James Yap will be lucky to be only staying in the ICU today.

While all of that was happening, Panda was jumping up and down, hoping that Terence Leather grabs James Yap in the jersey and bloodies him with punches in the face. “Priceless!”, as Panda says. He is definitely awake. The hate that this Panda has on James Yap is unimaginable. Nash Castro was — still nowhere to be found. Yours truly hoped that Leather would have just settled to punch Kris Aquino in the face. Because she’s irritating. DIBAAAAAAAAAH? AHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!

The bench clearing situation was marred with towel-throwing, middle finger raising and cursing; add to that Leather’s eyes that came from hell. He would not stop staring angrily at the PF bench with anger, like a predator looking for his prey. The refs came into action, We all lost the excitement to watch the situation. We just sat down after the referees started calling technical fouls.

The hero of the game was Ali Peek. He was the one who held back Terence Leather and later, Enrico Villanueva away from Leather. He should be guaranteed with a bouncer job in Embassy after he retires in the league. The owners of Emba should show tapes of Ali Peek in action so they would be open again. Renren Ritualo’s efforts to clear up things also appreciation-worthy but he was pretty drunk when that happened. He only threw his hands up in the air and then he stumbled after being bumped by a fellow Phone Pal. James Yap owns the superstar play of the game. No doubt about it. Had he not provoked Leather by his kick, the situation would have not worsened. What’s worse is that he ran for his life after he kicked Leather, and he was laughing while he was running as if the commotion he caused was just part of a child’s playground. What a fucking coward.

There you go girls, the MVP poster boy you idolize and fantasize is not the ideal wife. He runs away from troubles he starts and just laughs at it like nothing happened. Not your ideal partner, let alone the ideal idol. I hope you’re reading this, Kris Aquino. THERE’S YOUR MAN WITH THE MILLION MOVES… He definitely showed his arsenal of sipa sabay takbo moves.

I almost forgot to say that the game continued after that huge bench clearing incident and that the game had a final result. It’s 98-83 in favor of the Phone Pals. Jimmy Alapag bombed the Giants with his long three-point bombs from the parking lot. Alapag ended up with 26 markers. Sta. Lucia and Talk and Text square off on Friday to determine the opponent of Ginebra in the Quarterfinals. I would have loved to see James Yap to be suspended, but they’re out of the running. Terence Leather will most likely be suspended, in unanimous opinion of the T15P correspondents.

After the game, T15P tried to get some comments from the players who were involved…

Terence Leather: It doesn’t hurt but man, HE WAS FUKKIN FAST!

Ali Peek: Did you see my UFC-style grappling on Leather and Villanueva? I’ve been perfecting that for years! I want to be the next Bobby Lashley!

James Yap: Ha ha ha ha ha ha! Hi was su sluw in ranning. NO FREYSHUR!

I told ya! The PBA never runs out of drama!